


House in the Trees

by wingsyouburn



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Scene, Character Study, Fandom Snowflake Challenge, Gen, Genuary Fic Event, Pre-Captain America: The Winter Soldier
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-23
Updated: 2021-01-23
Packaged: 2021-03-15 08:22:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 961
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28935471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wingsyouburn/pseuds/wingsyouburn
Summary: Steve at the opening night of his Smithsonian exhibit.
Relationships: Howling Commandos & Steve Rogers
Comments: 8
Kudos: 15
Collections: Genuary 2021





	House in the Trees

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Yeetresponsibly](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yeetresponsibly/gifts).



> For yeetresponsibly, who has proven that we don't need to work together in order for him to feed me fic ideas. I love and hate you. 
> 
> Written for a few challenges: Fandom Snowflake Challenge on DW and the Genuary Fic Event on Tumblr. This was a response to my own lyric challenge I created for Snowflake, with the song lyric: _When the last of your friends have gone, you learn a whole lot about hanging on and on._ from "House in the Trees" by Andrew McMahon in the Wilderness.

_When the last of your friends have gone_

_You learn a whole lot about hanging on and on_

_But if you crash and nobody sees_

_Just remember there will always be_

_A room for you in my house in the trees_

\- Andrew McMahon in the Wilderness, “House in the Trees”

Steve was against the Smithsonian exhibit from the start.

Intellectually, yes, he understood that there were Captain America collectors. People who followed his career, from the USO shows to leading the charge across the European front, people who wanted to honor him. But they didn’t know the man behind the shield, and to glorify his successes left a sour taste in his mouth.

In the end, it was Natasha who convinced him to go to the exhibit’s opening night. “It’ll be fun,” she said, bumping her hip against his. “They’re expecting you to be there.”

“They’ll want me to make some sort of speech and they can record it for ‘history.’” He even made air quotes, like he’d seen Clint do once.

“So skip the speech. Coulson said the exhibit’s pretty nice. Respectful.” Natasha raised an eyebrow. “And you know how big a fan Coulson is.”

“I’m aware.”

“He would have pointed out any inaccuracies long before now. SHIELD had its input on it too.” Natasha hooked her arm through his. “I’ll go with you. It’ll be fun.”

The last thing Steve wanted was to confront his past in one so-called “fun” evening, but eventually he relented.

Which was how he found himself at the Smithsonian in a suit and tie, Natasha beside him, facing the crowd. Thanks to Pepper’s PR skills, Steve issued a statement to the press ahead of time, but that didn’t stop reporters from following him throughout the museum, microphones and cameras everywhere.

The other Avengers, save for Thor, were in attendance as well. Tony soaked up media attention everywhere he went, and that took some of the heat off Steve. His breathing caught in his chest, just like it did when he was younger, but this was anxiety, not asthma. Steve breathed past it and pushed forward into the exhibit.

“Captain America: The Living Legend & Symbol of Courage,” the sign out front proclaimed. Steve snorted. The only thing legendary about him was the fact that he lived, long after he should have died.

He walked past signs showing his height, before and after the serum, followed by a replica of a motorcycle he’d ridden. The walls were decorated with stories of his victories throughout the war. Steve didn’t read them. He didn’t have to. He already knew what happened.

And then he saw the uniforms.

Seven of them, Steve’s original Captain America uniform in the center. Bucky’s uniform stood to the right, followed by Falsworth and Morita. To the left were the uniforms worn by Dum Dum, Gabe Jones, and Dernier. A lump formed in Steve’s throat.

The Howling Commandos.

They’d gone on without him. They’d fulfilled other missions with the Scientific Strategic Reserve, not that Steve would expect any less. There were signs and stories about their lives, with and without Captain America. Overhead, the Smithsonian narrator talked about the Commandos and their victories. “Bucky Barnes,” the narrator said, “is the only one of the Commandos to give his life in service to his country.”

He couldn’t look at the display about Bucky. Not right now. That pain was still fresh, the grief sitting in his stomach like a lead weight. He’d abandoned them. He’d done what he thought he had to, but what if there had been another way?

What if he’d been able to save Bucky? What if he’d gone back to Peggy? What if he’d been able to grow old with the Commandos, serve his country, to decide how to live his life? To everyone around him, World War II was a part of history.

For Steve, it was still a vivid memory.

Cameras flashed around him. He was aware that the reporters had caught up to him, that they were recording this moment in hopes of the most sensational headline. If he didn’t give a statement, they’d just make one up for him.

But they couldn’t take this moment away from him. No one could. It was just him and his memories of the Commandos. Fighting together, drinking together, sharing the burden of war in the way only comrades in arms knew how. His closest friends - and he never even got to say goodbye to them.

All of them survived the war. That was a victory. Steve could look up what happened after that. He could visit their graves, pay his respects. And he would do it in his way - not in front of cameras, not for the story, not for the spectacle the Smithsonian made of his life.

“You okay, Cap?”

Natasha’s voice startled him. Steve blinked, and he was no longer in a European bar, but the middle of the Smithsonian. “I’m fine,” he said, the words automatic. “I think I’m done here.”

“There’s still more to see, if you want.” Natasha’s voice was neutral. “I hear there’s even a video presentation.”

“No.” The clips they displayed throughout the hall were enough. Steve didn’t need to see those memories replayed for him again - he knew them well enough already. “I’ve had enough.”

He spun on his heel and marched for the door. Reporters chased after them, but he ignored them, raising his chin and staying silent. If there were tears in his eyes, no one but Steve would know. Tonight he would go home and raise a glass to his comrades in arms.

As long as Steve lived, their memories would too. They would always have a place with him. Whether they were there to join him or not.

**Author's Note:**

> Obviously give "House in the Trees" a listen if you want to be hit even harder in the feels. The lyrics are all Andrew McMahon.


End file.
